Home My Journey Mini Me Update – Reading, Medicating & Drinking Chalky Cement

Mini Me Update – Reading, Medicating & Drinking Chalky Cement

by InvisiblyMe
A chalk board with a clock face and the word 'update' drawn on it.

I hope everyone has survived the trials and tribulations that come with Christmas, New Year and settling back into the swing of ‘normal’ life. This is one of those me-me-me posts, but I wanted to give you all a little update on a few things.

Stoma Shenanigans

Among other appointments, I’ve seen a local surgeon who had met me at A&E before, though I have no other real experience with/of him. He’s suggested stoma revision surgery – my small bowel forms a sharp angle before the stoma, which narrows and causes problems. It also twists on itself, causing agony, which can then lead to an obstruction and A&E. I must admit the thought of more surgery is horrendous, but at the same time it’s not sunk in yet. I’m too busy keeping myself busy and not properly processing it all until I have to (not that I could recommend denial and business – I’m not the best of role models here!)

I had his recommended pre-op test last week to rule out any other abnormalities prior to surgery. This was a barium drink and fluoroscopy. The barium drink itself is vile, like the worst dirty pint you can imagine while having a chalky texture and consistency of wet cement. Once that was over with, however, the test was painless and straightforward, and I was done and out of the hospital far quicker than I’d anticipated. I’ll do a separate post on this soon incase knowing a little more about the experience is helpful for anyone else.


In other news… I’ve discovered some meds aren’t being absorbed, to the extent that some tablets are coming out whole in the bag (which can also block the stoma, eek!) I’ve had to request everything in liquid form and I’ve swapped my OTC supplements to crushable tablets and chewables.

I’ve been so on-and-off with taking meds for various reasons, including the above. I’ve now made myself a little medication chart so each day of the week I can tick everything off and make sure I’m back on track.


A photo of me holding a Trio booklet, stoma supply samples, and a red Trio apron.

I received my Trio Ostomy Care sample kit over the weekend, complete with healthy eating booklet, seals, Pearls & apron. Guess who loves freebies!

Book Lovin’!

I’ve been getting through The Circle by Dave Eggers, which knew nothing about when I started reading it. I was also unaware the 2017 film with Tom Hanks and Emma Watson is based on it. I may watch it out of curiosity at a later date, but only when I’m in a zen frame of mind because Emma Watson makes me want to fork my eyes out.

I may also look a little online shopping with The Book Depository this week because they’ve got some good discounts on at the moment.

Pain Management

I’ve been back to see my Pain Management therapist and although I am still in two minds about a lot of it, there are some positives in terms of it hopefully getting me past the block, the procrastination, the resistance to living and doing some of the things I want and need to do. This even includes thinking about the year and some of the goals I want to have, as well as some of the things I’d like to do. I just hit a wall and can’t push past it right now. I’m also realising more and more that I’m getting caught on the same negative thoughts and worries about work and money and future career (or lack thereof). It shouldn’t be the most important thing, and yet it is, but probably for all of the wrong reasons.

I’m also struggling with the need for busyness and productivity at the expense of anything fun or enjoyable, but that’s a whole other shit storm of mind mess to trawl through.

Apparently, I have “excellent insight and a phenomenal ability to self-analyse”. Unfortunately, overthinking can be a dangerous thing and it’s not something I’d rush to recommend. I have a few tasks for the next four weeks in the hopes of pushing past the ‘stuckness’.

Blog Jazz

I have ironed out a few teething issues with the blog and WP, and I hope you’re able to read/like/comment/ignore Invisibly Me without any problems! 🙂 Please do let me know if you have any suggestions for the blog, or anything you’d like to see featured or topics you’d enjoy covered.

I hope everyone is doing as well as possible – Thanks again for stopping by! ?


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Wendy Bloom January 17, 2018 - 5:15 pm

Hello dear Caz, Boy, are you coping with a lot! Having had many experiences with barium, I enjoyed the very apt description that you gave of it. I’m amazed that you can be so funny, given everything you’ve dealt with health wise, and continue to deal with. You are extremely insightful and analytical. Remember that you are intelligent, hilarious, and incredibly wise. Especially for someone so young. I know that the wisdom comes from having suffered so much, both in body and mind. It would be nice if you possessed a little less, and could enjoy the freedom, and the foolishness that often accompanies youth. Big hugs to you. W

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:53 pm

I’m not quite sure what to say Wendy, though I think you’re being too kind in your lovely comments (but as I’m TRYING to learn to take compliments, I will) – Thank you, and thank you so much for taking the time to read and write back. I’m sorry you’ve had experiences with the dreaded barium too; you would have thought in this day and age they could make it like a chocolate milkshake, or a banana frappe. Anything would be better than what it’s been like for so long! I hope it’s not too late for me to let go a little, to think a little less, and to enjoy life (though turning 30 this years makes me feel not so young). Again Wendy, thank you so much – hugs to you too!  ♥
Caz 🙂

I tripped over a stone. January 17, 2018 - 5:15 pm

Caz, I nominated you for both awards!

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:53 pm

Thank you – that’s very kind! 🙂

I tripped over a stone. January 17, 2018 - 5:18 pm

The puppies are under blog on my menu! Oopps I’ve been updating my blog too. I’m really liking this new layout you have here!

sala January 17, 2018 - 5:46 pm

how are you doing ok with this cold winter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:54 pm

I hate it!! I think I’m allergic to it, so maybe I’ll just have no choice but to move somewhere warm & sunny! Hope you’re keeping warm and not letting the weather get you down 🙂

V.J. Knutson January 17, 2018 - 5:49 pm

Take care. i know how much the medical world can take out of a person.

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:55 pm

It can be very life-consuming, as well as emotionally & physically quite draining. All the more reason to find positive, uplifting things to fill our lives with (an area I need to work on). Thank you – I hope you are keeping well 🙂

Blogging_with_Bojana January 17, 2018 - 6:35 pm

Let in sink. No rush decisions.

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:56 pm

Thank you, I needed that reminder 🙂

Natalie | Surviving life's hurdles January 17, 2018 - 8:14 pm

Aw Caz, I’m sorry you might have to have surgery again and your meds aren’t all being absorbed! I know what you mean about work and money worries I was exactly the same before I got my pension and I also tend to be an overthinker too. You always seem to have a good book on the go, I think you’ll like my bookish surprise I’ve got planned for next week!!! Wishing you all the best xx

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 2:59 pm

Thank you for taking the time to read & comment and be as awesome as always Nat, especially with everything you’ve got going on health-wise. I really do hope things pick up, or that you can be treated asap if it’s a relapse. I don’t know quite what to do with the thoughts and worries I have re: work, career, money – I would say that maybe I could win the lottery and do charitable work thereafter but I don’t play!! Ooops, never going to win that way 😛 Looking forward to the bookish surprise whenever it’s ready (but put yourself & your health first above blogging) – you have me very curious, I do love reading!!

KEGarland January 17, 2018 - 8:44 pm

I do hope your health improves in ways that are peaceful for you…hope this makes sense. Read The Circle last year and LOVED it. The movie…not so much. You’ll probably be very disappointed.

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 3:00 pm

Thank you, that’s very kind! 🙂
Glad you loved The Circle too, it’s so gripping isn’t it? I’m going to be sad when it’s finished so I’m eeking out the last pages. I have the distinct feeling the film will be disappointing too, so I’m very glad I read the book first. Did you read the book first too? x

Christy B January 18, 2018 - 1:12 am

Ooooh let me know by the end of The Circle what you thought of it. I wanted to see the film but didn’t – now I may just read the book instead.

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 10:53 am

I only have a small bit left and unless the ending is a mammoth disappointment enough to ruin the whole book, then I’d definitely recommend it. It starts to get under your skin because you can see and imagine the tech developments happening in our world, some already are, and it’s a smooth read too (intelligently written but authentic in its voice of the characters etc). I don’t hold out much hope for the film but I might check it out just out of curiosity. However, I’d definitely recommend the book first, if not instead of the film entirely. I’m going to be quite sad to finish it now that I’m hooked on it!
Enjoy! 🙂

suresh lukhi January 18, 2018 - 11:17 am

hey dear,
This info is very wonderful,thank you so much for sharing….

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 3:01 pm

Thank you, I’m glad you liked the post 🙂

Viola January 18, 2018 - 11:27 am

Thanks for this update on yourself. These really are a lot of medical issues you have to deal with right now. I really appreciate it that you take the time to comment on my blog and provide us with valuable reviews and informatiion!

InvisiblyMe January 18, 2018 - 3:02 pm

I enjoy your blog, and I’m grateful for you stopping by to read the drivel I write and leave lovely comments! There are plenty of people who have it WAY worse than I do, but we’re all different, we all cope differently, lead different lives etc, so I think it’s important to show that things can be tough sometimes. Take care 🙂

Terri, Reclaiming HOPE January 18, 2018 - 3:53 pm

It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot right now Caz. I know it can seem overwhelming at times, and I know exactly what you’re talking about with feeling “stuck.” I’ve been dealing with that for the last couple of weeks now, though not so much medical issues as trying to move forward with other things. Wishing you all the best as you go forward with your next steps medically and pain=management-wise.

The Daisy Pages January 19, 2018 - 7:24 pm

Hi Caz, lovely to read your updates and your honest posts as always. I hope the weekend is a good one for you x

InvisiblyMe January 20, 2018 - 5:58 am

Thank you – you have a lovely weekend too 🙂

Joraffe January 19, 2018 - 10:20 pm

Hi Caz,

I think your blog is great!

It genuinely annoys me that the barium drink is vile – as if you are not going through enough already!! The mind boggles as to how they think it is acceptable !!

InvisiblyMe January 20, 2018 - 6:00 am

That’s very kind to say about the blog, thank you. And you’re right – it’s bad enough without this disgusting drink to worry about. With so many scientific advances, I don’t know why they can’t make it more like a damn lovely chocolate milkshake! 🙂
Take care and have a good weekend x

Suzanne Cox January 20, 2018 - 8:43 am

Caz, sorry to hear that you need surgery. Wishing you all the best. I think its great that you are sharing details of this on your blog. Will be very helpful to other people, especailly people who have relatives with similar problems. Know what you mean about over-thinking, its a difficult one. Try and get some down time when you can.


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