Finishing Your Costly Free Trial


Is this something you’d like to do, given the chance? To cancel, to get a refund, to go back and have a life you remember from before illness? I would. But it can do more harm than good to reminisce and live life in regrets and what-ifs and wanting things to be different.

Chronic, invisible illness is (as the ‘chronic’ part suggests) a long term kind of deal. It’s a relationship for the long haul. Not always, but usually. Things can get better, they can get worse, they can fluctuate over time or they may stabilise.

Generally speaking, it’s not a free trial. In fact, it’s usually a very costly subscription. Sometimes a little laughter along the way can help. Don’t waste your life waiting for the trial to end. Live your life with purpose and enjoy what you can while you’re paying for this subscription.

Caz  ♥




  1. Margaret
    April 5, 2018 / 4:47 pm

    I don’t know what it’s like to feel normal, so I might not like it :):):)

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:25 pm

      Hahah, good point! I think ‘normal’ is so different for all of us, I just wish the world cottoned on to the fact that it’s a social construction in itself, it is what we make it. x

  2. April 5, 2018 / 4:57 pm

    That made me laugh ?. Let us know when you figured out to end the trial period of living with chronic illness. Brilliant as always!

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:27 pm

      I’ve been in touch with customer services. – They’re passing it on to management to investigate, but since then when I’ve tried to call the line has gone dead… I think the number has been blocked and the website is down… x

  3. April 5, 2018 / 5:21 pm

    Hah, I like your metaphor and like what you said about living with purpose while we’re paying for the subscription. Great post!

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:28 pm

      Thank you so much – I’m glad you liked it! 🙂

  4. April 5, 2018 / 5:32 pm

    Man, I needed to hear this. I am just questioning everything today… thanks, Caz.

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:52 pm

      I really do hope you’re doing okay Kim – question things but take time to distract yourself in between as the cycle of overthinking can get incredibly exhausting. Sending hugs your way.x

  5. April 5, 2018 / 6:11 pm

    I was going to say – it costs lots of money to feel this bad! One treatment alone – a weekly syringe – is $2800 a pop, no insurance coverage, and I can barely work enough to cover it.

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:58 pm

      Ouch, very expensive indeed, I’m so sorry you’re having to struggle so much with money just to provide the treatments you need. Invisible/chronic illness can come with a huge, never-ending price-tag, mentally, physically and financially. x

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:59 pm

      You’re welcome, I’m glad you liked the post =]

  6. April 5, 2018 / 6:50 pm

    Excellent advice. I’m doing just that. We’re getting much older and slowing down, but we live each day with gusto.

    Have a fabulous day. ♥

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:01 pm

      I’m so glad to hear you live each day with passion & gusto – it can be hard to do when bogged down with illness, worries, day to day stress, and yet it’s so important to make the most of what we have and the situation we’re in. Thanks for the comment, I hope you’re having a good week! 🙂

  7. April 6, 2018 / 4:24 am

    Dont you wish it was that simple! To just cancel the bad things in life ? I am sorry that you are dealing with this ?

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:04 pm

      There are people doing it a lot worse than I am, but it’s a challenge nonetheless. Oh if only we could cancel the bad things..! Thank you for the lovely comment – I hope you’re doing okay and having a positive week 🙂

  8. April 6, 2018 / 7:19 am

    If only life was so simple eh! ?

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:05 pm

      One can only wish..!! x

  9. April 6, 2018 / 9:11 pm

    I really admire your positivity. I think that with difficult life situations that you have been dealt, whether illness or otherwise reminising can be dangerous and make you feel a lot worse, It takes self-control not to do this but I guess its worth it.

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:37 pm

      Self-control can be hard to conjure up but worth it in order to live more presently in the moment and be hopeful for the future. I must admit on a day-to-day basis at the moment I’m struggling and not all that positive at all, but it’s swings and roundabouts. It’s important to acknowledge that and not feel bad for struggling. Thanks Suzanne! 🙂

  10. April 7, 2018 / 6:07 pm

    I absolutely LOVE all of your posts! You are incredible and I am so glad I have been able to get to know you! You have helped me more than you will ever know!
    I have nominated you for an award and I hope I am attaching it the right way. It was on the post i did today!
    Lots of love to you my dear!!

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:39 pm

      That’s so incredibly lovely of you Alyssa – thank you so much!! It really does mean a lot to me  ♥
      Caz xx

  11. April 8, 2018 / 2:53 am

    Brilliant metaphor. I’d like to cancel mine, please. I’ll even skip the refund.

    • April 10, 2018 / 5:40 pm

      Skip the refund and no complaints will be made, just cancel the damn thing!!
      Totally feel where you’re coming from. Thanks for the comment Bonnie 🙂
      Take care and I hope your week is a positive one. x

  12. April 8, 2018 / 5:41 am

    I LOVE this, Caz! It is so you!
    It is exactly why I have nominated you for the 3 Day Quote Challenge!
    I enjoy reading your page.
    Honesty can be a love-hate relationship. You have such a beautiful balance,
    <3 Me and God love you!

  13. April 10, 2018 / 11:12 am

    What is normal again? 😉

    • April 10, 2018 / 4:21 pm

      Hah, I always think this these days! Normal is self-prescribed; your own ‘normal’ will be rather different to the next person’s ‘normal’. Nothing’s ever black and white, is it? Sometimes I wish it were more straightforward 🙂

  14. April 12, 2018 / 9:16 pm

    This is an amazing analogy for what chronic illness is. Much admiration for you for having such a positive and inspirational outlook on it against all odds! xx

  15. April 20, 2018 / 6:02 am

    Ohhh boy… if only! 🙂 <3 Jackie@KWH

    • April 20, 2018 / 10:11 am

      Yep, my thoughts exactly Jackie – if only…!! 🙂

  16. April 20, 2018 / 8:19 am

    Great post. And I love that graphic as well! I don’t have a chronic illness (other than the after-effects of radiotherapy and hormone therapy for prostate cancer), but I have friends this definitely applies to.

    • April 20, 2018 / 10:12 am

      You’ve been through quite enough yourself with all of that; I’m glad you’re doing better after effective treatment. Thank you for sharing & I’m glad you liked the post, Nick 🙂

  17. April 30, 2018 / 3:35 am

    I’ve recently joined this group! Had an auto accident where my car was totaled and I ended up with a concussion. While the lady who hit me has an insurance company that will pay for hospital bills, I am left with a headache for which they can find no reason. It is constant, but not debilitating…..just always there. How long will it last?

    • April 30, 2018 / 2:10 pm

      Hey Beverly, thanks for the comment. I’m sorry you had such an awful car accident, that must have been incredibly scary. I’m afraid I can’t answer your question about the headaches as I’m not a medical professional. Have you had a head MRI? I really do hope that sooner rather than later the headache will quiet down and go. I’ve never had a concussion but I would imagine that such trauma could take a while to overcome if there are lingering effects. x

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