[Article Share] What NOT To Say To Someone With Cancer

I came across this article recently proposing things NOT to say to someone with cancer. A psych lecturer interviewed six women, all of whom dealt with breast cancer in their 30s/40s, to list some of the best and some of the worst comments to receive from those around them. A lot of the points raised are ones you could apply to other chronic or invisible illnesses, not just cancer, and they all highlight how poignant the words and actions of those around us can be.




  1. February 18, 2017 / 7:48 am

    I’ll have a look at that article,it sounds really useful. The trouble is that if you don’t know what to say you can end up saying nothing at all, which is possibly even worse than saying the wrong thing. A few years ago I visited a friend at the hospice on what turned out to be his last day, and said hardly anything at all, mainly because I couldn’t trust myself not to break down, which he would have found hard. Sometimes wish I’d managed to say more, but glad I was able to show my support and in a sense words weren’t that important.

    • InvisiblyMe
      February 19, 2017 / 3:09 pm

      That’s a very good point. Showing care by not turning away because it’s hard or you don’t want to make the other person uncomfortable is key, as staying away or staying silent can be lonely and likely be something regretted in future. As long as you show care in some way then what’s said or how much/little is said often isn’t so important. I’m sure your friend enjoyed your company and appreciated your compassion on what would have been a difficult visit for the both of you.

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